You dab a little Hoppe’s #9 on your neck before going out on a date.
You clean a gun that hasn’t been shot since you cleaned it last ... week.
You go to a gun show and contemplate buying a particular gun for a half an hour before you remember you already have that one.
You have more .50 cal ammo cans than the Army.
You buy reloading dies before you get the rifle and the ammo.
You turn down sex to go shooting.
You run out of places to store, hide or harbor your collection.
The value of your guns exceeds the value of all your cars.
You get more shooting magazines than your wife gets catalogs.
Your lottery picks are all calibers, like 3-5-7-22-38-44 or your credit card PIN number is 3006 or 4570.
Your e-mail address ends in @kaboom.org.
You had to build an ammo depot in your back yard to hold your extras.
You replaced your wife’s walk-in closet with a walk-in gun safe.
You can’t watch tennis matches without thinking of shooting every time the score is 30-30.
You consider naming your unborn child Henry, Winchester, Marlin, Browning, etc.
Your reloading bench is made of better wood than your bedroom set.
You take your wife to a gun show for your 10th Anniversary and she is as excited to go as you are.
The largest gun store in your area calls you if they need something.
When buying a new gun, you plead with your gun shop to keep it until you have space for it.
You build a gun rack in your bedroom so that it’s closer to you than your wife.
Your wife goes in for a pelvic exam, and you tell your friends she is being “bore sighted.“
You wash the clothes and several spent casings fall out of your rolled-up sleeves.
Your mother-in-law asks what new gun junk you want for Christmas this year.
You make $30 per hour at work, but spend 30 minutes on your knees at the range looking for that last piece of .40 S&W brass.
It takes you several minutes leafing through Small Arms of the World to find a gun you have never fired.
You have a callus on your shoulder.
You’ve ever sent a new scope back to Leupold for repair.
Factories ask you how well their guns hold up.
