The Clinton Administration just blew our cover, my friends, releasing to the media a 331-page report titled “The Communication Stream of Conspiracy Commerce” which details how we, the right-wing would-be masters of an enslaved America, are seeking to destroy Bill Clinton.
Our determination to bring this about, of course, stems from our recognition that Clinton is a man of rock-solid moral character and unparallelled brilliance, who alone can deliver the helpless masses of America into a Rennaissance of compassion and getting-along-ness.
(Okay, stop snickering!)
We here at The Armed Genius are not specifically named in the report (and frankly, I’m insulted), but you can be sure that when they speak of “well-funded right-wing think tanks and individuals”—the originators of the calumnies bedeviling the White House—they had us in mind. So maybe they got the “well-funded” part wrong, but our slim budget is obviously merely a cover for the billions of dollars and the vast power we all stand to gain once that paragon of virtue, William J. Clinton, is out of the way.
By the time you read this, there should already be press reports quoting some Clintonista or another talking about Jim McDougal’s “thirty pieces of silver”—meaning, perhaps, a lighter sentence—for his corroboration of David Hale’s allegations against then-Gov. Clinton with respect to illegal loans related to the Whitewater affair.
The sad truth is, there is a massive strain of messianism in the Clintons’ view of themselves. This first emerged long ago, when Clinton spoke of “powerful forces” arrayed to sink his wife’s draconian
health-care nationalization scheme. Now, with his day of reckoning fast approaching, the President and his apologists are bringing their psychotic narcissism out of the closet (perhaps the same one where Hillary hid her billing records for two years).
Well, far be it from The Armed Genius not to play along with the gag. Therefore, starting with this issue and periodically hereafter, we’ll be “exposing” elements of the right-wing media conspiracy collaborating in the falsification of the truth about the Clinton political machine that has seized the U.S. government. In this issue: NET (formerly National Empowerment Television).
The satellite/cable television network ran a report last January called “Quid Pro Coal” on its American Investigator program. Linking the September executive decree establishing the
Cascade Grand Staircase-Escalante National Monument to a low-sulfur coal venture in (surprise, surprise!) Indonesia, the report means that the Clinton machine has once again taken a hit below the water line.
To be fair, the linkage of the monument, which put America’s largest and most promising source of low-sulfur coal off-limits, to massive campaign contributions from the wealthiest man in Indonesia, did not originate with NET. In fact, the White House will surely argue that the progression of this story is following the “media food chain” flow chart contained in their conspiracy report, because one of the first to publicize the link was none other than Dispatches, a biweekly publication of the Western Journalism Center, which was named in the White House report.
Clearly, here we have a prime example of the media food chain at work—Sarah Foster, who wrote the Dispatches articles about the Lippo-Escalante connection, broke the story in the October/November 1996 issue of “Land Rights Letter,“ which must surely be funded by one or another property rights group that would easily fall into the category of “right-wing” according to the Clintonistas.
Both Dispatches and NET, of course, have sites on the World Wide Web, which is sufficient to establish the next step in the progression, which is that such “right-wing” niche media disseminate their claims on the Internet, which somehow brings them to the attention of “right-wing” daily newspapers like the Washington Times, the Wall Street Journal, and the “tabloid” Sunday Telegraph of London (which happens to be second only to the august Times of London as a respected newspaper across the pond).
Having thus been made “respectable” by being reported in these unreliable “right-wing” dailies, the allegations—which, you must not forget, originate with “well-funded right-wing think tanks and individuals” with a venomously anti-Clinton agenda—come to the attention of Republicans in Congress, who hold hearings that, naturally, get the attention of “real” media outlets like the Washington Post and CNN.
(I said, stop snickering!!)
So the next step should be that the Utah coal lockup will be linked to the multibillionaire Riady clan in those media outlets that don’t share the enlightened elite liberalism of the old-line Big Media establishment. If those in the White House who have been watching the right-wing media conspiracy are right, it should happen any day now—if it hasn’t already.
From there, it should progress to Al D’Amato and other influential congressional committee chairs, who will abuse their access to the dutiful scribes of the Fourth Estate to further trash the reputation of the Second Coming of Franklin Roosevelt.
